Today I made a list of everyone I have had sex with...there is more than double my age...
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
The djing cat is back again. I think he just makes appearances when im shit drunk just to fuck with my mind.
The guatemalans kept making all these sexual suggestions ... With the corn
I'm pretty sure you called me last night and screamed that she was force-feeding you a bagel.
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Just found bud in my hair....gotta love curls
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
She's cute, but batshit. Like some kind of dominatrix disney princess.
And after that you guys started calling arbor mist "breakfast juice"
3-9 out of 10... Depends on the situation. Taco Bell is more of an idea than a restaurant.
How stoned are you?
Crying on the toilet and taking a shit. This is what being an adult is about
We have a great relationship based on communication, sex, and mutual loathing.
Remind me to talk to you about nipple clamps.
Why is there a trampoline for sale in my front yard?
Randomize
