I have a pretty basic diameter of my vaginal abyss. I'm sure it won't hurt.
i'm sending her a home depot gift card for the hole i put in her wall. call it good?
She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
after last nights cooking expirments i have lost all faith in the fire alarm battery
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
So i know you wont get this until you land, but if i'm late its cause i was having sex. being blunt and hope that explains things.
So it sounded like a midget was barfing IN our walls again this morning ...
What's great about college is that i can eat chocolate cereal for every meal and call it a money saving technique.
New hot neighbor boys moving in across from us...So i did the logical thing and bought two 30 packs up the hill and walked right by em. Consider the line hooked and ready to reel.
I don't know if I should feel proud or ashamed of myself...ashamed for making myself a drink at 6:15am or proud for actually being awake that early.
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
So you don't take a regular pic with her, but you take a selfie with her ass. Interesting...
I'm actually pinning crap for Friendsgiving like a boss right now. These bitches better show up.
Breaking news: when you're gone every towel is a dick towel
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
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