did i leave my keys in your car? BTW: sorry for throwing that drink on your date.
I just told my doc I would like to talk about my drinking problem, but that it would probably get in the way of my weekend plans.
i make out with random ppl when i drink he shouldnt feel special
The drink u got me is pineapple something w. Cigarete ashes in it.ima drink it anyway
official worst smell ever. a used condom that has gone through the dryer.
She was giving me great head...... until I asked her how much this was going to cost.... she left abruptly
Do you think I can haggle my way to discounted weed on 4.21?
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
I need to find my pants, a way out of here, and a cheeseburger.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
I wish pancakes were everywhere. Just pancakes. I want lilies at my wedding. No dress. Just priest. Just lilies.
Hey is there a picture of me in a trash can on your phone?
I don't think you understand...I'm really good at getting drunk
Then he asked if he could pee on me and things really went downhill
Right after i got done cumming i sat back and gave a big Ric Flair "WOOOOOO!"
Randomize
