Gordon Ramsey's restaurant in NY is $150 each for the chef's menu
So you're taking me there this weekend?
oh, looks like he just opened a new restaurant right by us- it's called "McDonald's". Must be scottish food.
The woman in front of me has a completely clear purse. I can see everything. It's ballsy because her vagisil is on display.
so its official, girls can see a boner through my snuggie.
Let me make this really simple. We woke up this morning and fucked three times. When I got up and took a shower she cleaned up the mess from last night and did the dishes. Then we went out and she bought me brunch. I don't give a FUCK how much you don't like her.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Be careful. Don't drive if your body turns into a caterpillar again.
Apparently we were just playing "bang a bridesmaid". I'm not sure if I won or lost...
Post a pic on facebook and see if those same 46 girls find shitting in the bed handsome and adorable
Every girl my sister has brought home from college I've had sex with, check and mate motherfucker
My stalker sent me an erotic poem. Who knew anyone could find a way to rhyme birth and girth so eloquently?
I just want a man to crawl into my bed with me and never crawl out. Anti socialism at his best.
Yeah, I'm sure we have time for sex AND ihop.
In other news, I woke up still drunk and I think I literally just broke the Guinness book of world records for most bloody Mary's in one day...
We both know we're cheating on one another. But our side pieces aren't as kinky as us...so yeah, we're still together. This is a fucked up relationship.
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
Randomize
