She told me at midnight she would blow me harder than a new years party kazoo
I thought his dick was headless. then I pulled back the foreskin.
Went to use to bathroom and walked in on karaoke. Two girls singing "a whole new world" to each other in the shower. I'm gonna miss this place in the summer
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
i have no feeling in my penis or fingers but i think it was worth it
I put a toilet paper roll with my number on it by his face... hooking up is not happening
You came in as I got off work, ordered us jack and cokes. Put them on my tab, and then proceeded to fall asleep on the bar.
I actually didn't mind her sub-par blowjob skills.. It took me back to a time when skipping class was noticed, and my liver didn't look like a worn out shoe
No no no...you park the car, stick your tongue down his throat, slip your number in his pocket, invite him to insomnia, and THEN LEAVE. You go from awkward to epic in a matter of seconds.
Everyone threw up but him. I took off my shirt because I puked on it. There were also a lot of drag queens involved.
I mean jail does seem alright, all the free broth you can eat.
Im just confused who has their mom break up with someone
And as drunk as I was I was able to show my mom how to make text italicized in Microsoft word
My dreams last night were filled with sex and quidditch.
If I say I hate myself for it does it make it any better?
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