Theres just something about looking at pictures of your dick in church that doesn't feel right
He was really drunk and I dared him to jump the swimming pool on his bike. Sadly he couldn't. Hey did you know a testicle can burst?
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
He insisted on us having sex while watching the biggest loser and asked me if I could "resist the temptation".
Currently flirting with a 57 year old. Why do i do this
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
theres 2 cans of open Campbell's soup on the counter and a note that says "guess which one is puke" ... want lunch?
All I want is to send a text that says "i slept with someone while wearing nothing but purple argyle socks this weekend." But the only person i would send that to is you. But you already know. Because they were your socks.
I think your dad took our porno
I can't sleep. Send Llama pictures.
I crawled to the bathroom this morning there were cornpops scattered on the floor? What was I doing last night?
For real his Facebook page says he studied "sexual arts" at some random college I've never heard of. You've been warned.
I may or may not have just had sex in the bed of a pick-up at a drive-in movie theater.
sorry i was ignoring you last night i accidentally did a bunch of pcp and thought i was inside tron
just saw a girl run into an automatic sliding door, back up and try again
Randomize
