Ha. Yes. I'm at a strip club. I'm the barack obama of strip clubs
So when we opened his headboard we found a bottle of crisco sitting on top of his porn magazines.
I guess we all know what he was cookin.
Where does it all go? I've busted inside of you like 10 times in the last week.
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
Yes I was being legit. That's the only plant I want in my house. A growing penis.
So hungover. They actually hid easter eggs around me.
I wish there was an emoji to express our Eskimo Brothership
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
I will sleep with anyone I have to to make sure you don't get deported
I don't know if I'm feeling really nervous right now or just extremely horny.
THE CEO RESPONDED TO THE MEMO WITH HIS "UNICORN" EMAIL ADDRESS AND NOW HE'S APOLOGIZING TO EVERYONE FOR USING HIS PERSONAL EMAIL AT WORK.
CURRENTLY PLAYING FLIP CUP WITH A WORLD SERIES CHAMPION
Also your Swedish friend who's name I don't remember is really good in bed.
*Norwegian
Were not even through the second month of the year and I potentially may have torpedoed a marriage...
So, I found your eyebrow, someone glued it in between my eyebrows so I looked like I had a unibrow when I went to work...
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