I see lights
Your drunk and in times square. Time to take the 2 train home.
happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
No one showed up yet so I smoked 4:20 on chatroulette with a naked chick..
I am standing at the lion i publicly humped last night. i am mortified.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
I just found puke in my bra..
And by "got a tattoo" i mean i got a tattoo in the dorm bathrooms with a guy using his cousin's tattoo gun.
There is not enough soap in the world to make me feel clean after last night. Im gonna need jesus for this one
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
Last thing I remember was a hand in the pants. Then I woke up next to a full beer and a McDouble, which I promptly had for breakfast.
I have a terrible feeling that I made out with a fraternity last night
you just have the mind of an innocent, non-tainted child.
YOU KNOW THAT'S BULLSHIT BECAUSE YOU'RE THE REASON IT'S BULLSHIT
So our night ended with 6 cruisers, a fire truck, and an ambulance. Also, lots of blood. How was yours?
the teacher told me he was disappointed and when I asked why he just shook his head. remember that kid that caught us having sex behind the school? pretty sure that was his son.
may or may not have snorted a line of tums... wtf.
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