Turns out drinking large amounts of Gentleman Jack does NOT turn you into a Gentleman -- quite the opposite actually.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
i'm gonna start fucking more girls with asthma. help feed my ego.
everyone thought he was too sick to make it, but he showed up. Ten minutes in and he's doing vodka shots with nyquil chasers
trading diseases for a hangover? that's either a really good decision or a really, really bad one. we'll find out if he wakes up tomorrow
The party went downhill once the fire department had to be called to put out the kitchen fire.
My month off booze swimsuit season diet plan is working well. Plus I'm learning so much about my house, did you know a girl named Meagan lives here?
So instead of asking me for my number, he asked for my dad's because he wanted to "thank the man that helped create those tits."
he said we should drink responsibly and we all just kinda sat there laughing at him
His gf just liked my changed relationship status. She's gonna shit bricks when she finds out he left her for me. Bless her little heart.
He is getting no nudes from me. I don't even care if I'm losing his legal advice.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
i dunno dude, he took his shirt off and is rubbing jello shots on himself. i think he's done
I'll tell you all about it in person but let's just say the big dick fairy must really like me right now
Get over here and bring your drill!!! The strippers next door need help installing a stripper pole by their pool
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