Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
Well, I was going to ask you what happened to all my lipstick. Until I saw the giant red penis on my living room wall.
I had to carry you down because your legs weren't moving anymore but you were carrying the weights you stole from that guys room... and that's where the bruises came from.
I don't think I have but I might've died. If I have then come get me, I'm in the flower bed. And still game.
PRINCE HARRY WAS AT WAL MART SO NEXT TIME YOU BITCH ABOUT GOING TO WAL MART REMEMBER THAT EVEN PRINCE HARRY GOES TO WAL MART.
Convincing a cop that you have diplomatic immunity is way harder in Dallas than in Serbia. And you get fined for attempted bribery.
Keep it up. It gets easier when you turn 21. Something happens in people's brains when they turn 21 and all of a sudden you have the power to drink constantly and abuse drugs and still graduate with good grades and your shit together. Im almost positive I read it in my freshman year bio textbook
Question: trumpet bong. Can it work.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
I thought my ass was sore from the gym then I realized it was from being spanked. Confusing time in my life.
He used a trumpet as a funnel, said something about valve oil, and puked all over the garage.
Also he said my vagina was sculpted by gods so there must be some feelings here.
I had sex in the bed of a guy who owns a house last night so I feel like this is a significant step up from car sex in the parking lot of a library
Hey, I was just wondering why i dont have a shirt on, why im cuddling with a furnace, why im in my own basement, and where my car is.
Totally writing my paper on the toilet. Makes me miss you.
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