i think i just saw hanson at the grocery store. one might have been a girl. hard to tell. lets call that one taylor.
this just has baby written all over it
you did pass out in the elevator last night, so it could be motion sickness
You bet me 100 dollars that the Raiders would win the super bowl this year. I have it on tape.
We haven't even started dating yet but I already decided I'm going to cheat on her
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Do you think she's aware of my deep hatred or should I set her hair on fire in her sleep?
come in to starbucks and ill make you a 4loko latte before theyre banned
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Do your friends by chance have our inflatable deer head?
Nevermind, it's in the dryer.
I'm being responsible and going as a gay, slutty Mormon missionary. It's responsible because I'll have a bike helmet on for when I fall over because I'm too shitfaced to stand upright. It's safer than Count Fagula. I just need to come up with a line equal or greater than "Blaaaa I want to suck your dick"
Jäger goes great with personal crises and receding morals...
Ok despite the fact that both you and I love dick we could have a great marriage
We lost you in the bar so we waited outside for you...next thing you know you kick open the doors and yell "I'M ALIVE"
Randomize
