It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
So, halfway through sex he stops and starts crying. He said he's worried god hates him for all his bad decisions...think he meant to imply I was one of them...
I wish there were college classes that were useful to your daily life, like how to pack a proper bowl in pitch black darkness.
She has no definite jawline and all of her photo's have Ke$ha quotes as captions followed by a "<3" Even by your standards that is embarrassing.
apparently i told her i wouldn't press charges if she brought me food.
Mass texted booty calls to all the guys I've hooked up with this year to commemorate the end of the semester.
it wasn't a normal cookie, i figured that out 45 minutes into my exam
Just finished my quantum homework in ladies room writing with eyeliner. I am the party/physics champion.
I ate all his french fries. He was no longer useful to me.
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I'm trimming my pubes right now and the battery was wearing down. So I chose to only trim one side. I cut the right side down and now I look like pubic two-face. Right all trim and near and left like a caveman.
I don't get it. If he broke into Taco Bell at 2 am, then why couldn't he have brought me home a fucking taco???
Yeah, everything was going great until the mugging.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
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