would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
i had to apologize to my friends for being friends with me
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Remember when we made you finish your beer after you puked into your glass?
i hate being the asshole.
Chelsea passed out in the kiddie pool. Just added around 28 boxes of jello powder. Will let you know how it works out
I'm just sad for you. It sucks that the 17 douchebag asshole guys you're fucking can't morph into one nice, normal, non-alcoholic guy that has a drivers license and no criminal history.
Based on the time of Sean's "I'm on your street" phone call last night, we had sex for an hour and a half. Man, time flies when you're getting boned to an orgasmic death.
Also the girl beside me smells like she's been in a deep fryer.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
I woke up naked wrapped in a wolf blanket on the bathroom floor
When I came out of the bathroom you were naked dead asleep on the couch but your dick was still rock hard standing straight up. I almost took a pic. It was impressive.
Oh. Why can't it be something easy, like a punch card for blowjobs?
Sometimes a man just deserves to get woken up with a blowjob.
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