Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Good call on the strip club last night. Everytime i smell some flowery candle or air freshener I get transported back to having my face firmly planted in Riah and Desire's tits.
You're welcome.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
The thumbs up barstamp on my hand is mocking my hangover with its positivity.
At our floor meeting the RA was talking about bathroom hygiene and I really wanted to be like "what about shower sex."
Valid question
time out. can we just pause the wholesome understanding friendship thing and be fuck buddies for a night?
we need a secret handshake
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Ugh, I should just give up, and fuck him in a parking lot, and shave my head and walk naked through the streets of King's Landing.
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
I just talked to him. no worries he had the same fears you did this morning and smelled the dryer to make sure. you officially did not pee in there haha
It was great. We stayed up all night talking about objects he'd put in his theoretical vagina.
I wet willied a stranger last night didn’t I?
Finally got with the virgin.
Yeah? Howd that go?
As soon as I got it all the way in, I looked deep into her eyes and said "your soul is mine" in the deepest voice I could make. She was not amused.
Randomize
