I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
I just watched Juno. I kind of wish I was in highschool and pregnant
ok 1 i realized people actually live in central wisconsin and 2 culvers could be a good place to pick up chicks today
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
Great News, you CAN smoke bowls with a magnifying glass
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I'd rather not be labeled as that girl who came over, drank a bunch of their alcohol, woke up the 5 year old, broke shit and left
I tried to trade my phone for pizza last night. I guess I had priorities last night
I am eating a king sized snickers in the strip club. Good morning.
also I was promised more toga parties by popular media
He had a vasectomy. I think I'm in love.
I have to choose between charging my phone or my vibrator. This is bullshit.
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
