He asked about stds. I told him I don't have any... which I don't. They are now called sti's. Whooopsie
Don't ask how, but I'm pretty sure my name is now on a lease to a taco bell franchise in maryland...
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I was so intoxicated last night I was giving out my real name and number ugh.
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Ya I painted "STOP TRYING ANAL" on her headboard. I'm sick of listening to her whine through the wall and bitch the next day.
After what was supposed to be a one night stand I woke up to a message in my room wall written in marker "Kaitlin got it on in here" definitely a cock block down the road
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
do you think this outfit says "I maintained my dignity this weekend"?
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
Guy fieri is speaking only to me. We make eye contact. My whole body is vibrating. My head is purring. I am literally marbles.
I am confused/concerned about the circumstances that led to your consumption of 3 beta fish last night.
I'm unsure if I could pee myself at this point in my life
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
