So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
He had to pee in the sink beside my head because the girl that I was taking care of was passed out on the toilet. To answer your question: yes i took a peek. Thats why we hooked up later.
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
Just woke up with three stitches in my left boob. Nevertheless, I think I'm going to like this school.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
You screamed "she never feeds them anyway" and threw the fish tank off the 3rd floor balcony. Don't park on our side of the building.
Sex last night was mind blowing. your wife is one lucky lady.
I got blood in my smoothie but it still tastes ok. Fuck glenfiddich.
Seriously? A BAR is SPONSORING my 21... What did you do for your 21 again??
You went into the shower with my roommate and cursed him out asking why he was there
We ended up at a lesbian bar and all my co-workers tried to get me laid. This is not how I envisioned coming out.
In my defense, I haven't stolen anyone's clothes yet.
Yeah, that's a plus.
Being drunk isn't an excuse for eating all of the bacon asshole
Randomize
