Got some. In a truck. I will just pee you in the morning i guess?
do you wanna get some fucking pussy tonight.....THEN DRESS LIKE IT
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
There is a different car in my driveway. Have no clue how I got home.
Having never done that before, When should one expect the horrible shame to end? Days, months, ever?
A week or so, depending on size. In your case, maybe give it a month.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
She had her insurance card taped to her arm because it was the only thing she "couldn't take off and lose"
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I mean like if I stood up my head might pull me down like an anchor
He's pretty cool once you ignore the fact that he's trying to get into your pants
I found out his moms name, maiden name, profession, and office location, his dads name and profession, his home phone, picture of their house, all of his work profiles, and the cost of their house. All I'm trying to do is find his damn twitter
I vaguely remember making out with some dude. Please tell me he had all of his teeth.
They started shooting fireworks out of a dryer. It was my cue to leave.
They were supposed to legalize it when there was a chance someone might actually propose to me. I'm appealing this bullshit.
Oh hello Jordan's parents, I'm here to have sex with your son. He's in the shower? Oh great, I'll join him
Randomize
