This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
After he proceded to violently molest my tits until 9 am i snuck out of his room only to meet his mother downstairs, who informed me she heard the giant sexfest going on in the room next to them.. this was before she called us both "chickenshits".. worst walk of shame ever.
I somehow fell asleep on my kitchen counter using the microwave as a pillow
I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
Memorial weekend is going to be amazeballs. Jungle juice, drunk guys, and my vagina being stimulated by the vibrations of a 4 wheeler. I mean there is no way that can go wrong.
Found him fucking some random drunk chick in the bathrrom at the blue lep with a beer in each hand. had to give him props.
Well, it was good.. One step forward for my vaj.. One giant leap backwards for my integrity.
I really hope the fuck ferry pays me a visit to close out 2011 properly.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
I could just tape a camera with a live feed to my head & you could check in on me from time to time
One of my students submitted a thesis proposal to find the exact correlation between desire for sexual intercourse and vaginal heat.
Tell me you accepted it! This is critical fucking research!
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
Does your drug dealer have a printer I can use??
I blacked out in the cab last night... Cant remember getting in the front door, also i got into bed with my grandma.
We got to the hospital and the girls who caused the accident had already added you on facebook.
Randomize
