You thought that the "chillable" logo on the box wine was referring to a city in italy.
I am full of burrito and curiosity
Just made a Mimosa with Chardonnay and Emergen-C.
Some fat girl belted her graduation gown. That is not a good look for anyone.
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
If you go to the bathroom don't ask why there's diet coke on the toilet. Loller copter. Blow is fun.
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
This just spotted: a bagpiping Elmo on the street.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
You insisted we help some homeless guy put up posters for his missing pet alligator so we left you there because they were really just Chinese takeout menus.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
The only times we have to apologize in this friendship is when you intentionally punch me and that's only happened once so it's okay
It's slightly odd going to a booty call during morning rush hour with everyone else going to work.
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