he keeps commenting everything on my facebook. it's like he's virtually peeing on me
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
and i had to drink on "never have i ever unsuccessfully tried to seduce a virgin ginger"
Somehow ended up at a stranger's bridal shower. Everyone else is already drunk.
You both ran and jumped into the tub yelling Jamaican bobsled team
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Security deposit gone.
burned down garage with fireworks.
He has no idea he's waking up in slut palace tomorrow morning
Seriously I can't get a booty call for some baked goods.
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
she's always on high-alert for lesbians
Just to let you know we went to the circus yesterday...in case you didn't remember
Actually, my eyes didn't start bleeding until the next day. So it was a pretty awesome night overall.
(919) the date's not going well. He's on his phone talking about his eBay amine shit...
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