He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
i knew he was a douchebag when his facebook activities were "ladeis," and "gettin crunk wit ladeis"
she's telling me all about the love triangles of her sims. you tell me how it's going.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
your bra might or might not be a decoration on me and my roomies xmas tree haha
I drink way too much to have a type. Last weekend I picked up a guy who calls me "baby girl"
I vaguely remember stopping for a bag of bugles and some lube and then I woke up this morning with melted chocolate on my hands. I think I love him
So apparently I ended up throwing my clothes in the toilet after getting kicked out of TQ and ran around the neighborhood in my boxers. Works gonna suck hard once this hangover kicks in. Also: I lost a shoe so looks like flipflops for the rest of winter
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
Is her dick bigger than yours?
At this point in job hunting, I'm willing to become a leather daddy if it means some sort of income.
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
You know you're an upperclassmen when you go to a party with no makeup, wet hair, weed socks, and no shoes, take a shot ski, then leave
I just saw a chick driving drinking a juice box smoking all while on the phone that is talent
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