I bet there is no greater pleasure in life than pistol whipping people.
Anal.
You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
I just taped a plastic bag to my ceiling for the next time I have to throw up on the top bunk. Why am I so good at college?
We had sex after spending two hours in the drunk tank. It was really deep and meaningful
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
He was fucking her while he was wiping my tears.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Until this weekend, a man hadn't made me orgasm since the night Obama was elected. Now THAT is change I can believe in.
I brought a travel sized bottle of baby powder and sprinkled it on all of the couples making out on the wall in the basement
Pretty sure when I woke up the next morning we were still fucking. It just didn't stop.
so an orgy is about to happen in the next room if you wondered where i am currently at in life
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Why am I a human magnet for the worst dicks of the world?
Let me call you later. I’m lining up some office dick now that working at home is ending
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