People are allowed to visit it's just they can't be from Germany and have to wear masks.
So..he puked on my dress and I had to walk back to the dorms in his little sisters Scooby Doo pajamas.
I don't know you.
What are you talking about? And how drunk are you?
Both
I just learned you can mail a coconut. I'll be over in 3 days with the rum.
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
Apparently suggesting that she was the kind of girl who might be expected to kill someone's pets hurt her feelings...
This has been the biggest binge-drinking season of the decade.
I'm gonna be a few minutes late, some asshole just fell off the ferry so we had to stop.
Based on the grey fur I pulled from my teeth, I think her vagina has mice.
I'm sure you're still partially crippled from thar blow job on Saturday, so I understand it's probably difficult to text.
Hired a new intern today and we have something in common. I blew her boyfriend in high school. Do you think she knows?
I was so drunk last night dude. I woke up this morning to my oven being wide open and my pants on the kitchen floor.
He drove me to my therapist appointment because I was too drunk to drive. Total keeper.
I slept with six men with different nationalities this week. Who says I'm not a woman of culture?
He was talking about his friends deceased ferret and I still managed to orgasm.
Now THAT is dedication!
Randomize
