I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
The secrurity code on my debit card is 420, can not lose this card.
I saw a stripper quit while on stage to months ago nothing you tell me will amaze me
Im drunk with people I love less than you. fix it.
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
I know this is really fun but I don't wanna glow anymore
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
I could go for watching some naked price is right. Looks like a good time to me.
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
I have feelings that need drinking.
You also once spent an entire hour explaining the origin of the strip steak to me.
We were supposed to hurry because the restaurant closed at 9. I ended up giving him a blow job so we had to eat at Arby's instead.
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
You know your late night booty call was a huge fail when you go back to your car after it's over, and it's still warm.
He's throwing Skittles into my cleavage and some are rebounding into my crouch.
Well he's scoring either way then.
Randomize
