Operation extremely regretful is in full effect
last night I thought his shirt said yale... but this morning it definitely says old navy.
it's like there's an entire ecosystem in your vagina.
On the way home from Florida I threw up at the beginning border and ending border of 6 states. You win this year Spring Break.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
That's like lying to my vagina. I can't betray it like that.
she said we were using the spray butter as air freshener
Show him your tits if he says no
They're not help-me-out-of-jams tits. They're I-fake-people-into-thinking-they-look-good tits.
Just sayin. I pissed on his couch, and ruined his stove. If he's not mad, we're partying there every weekend...
Also can you rate on a scale of zero to jesus restraining order christ how creepy it is that he found a porn star that looks like me and has watched all the porn that she's been in
Se wrote an essay in class about proper and fashionable winter wear for dogs. Of course I regret fucking her.
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
So I'm just casually at the grocery store when I remember that there's still a clove of garlic in my vagina
Hey, taking organic chemistry means no one is allowed to tell you you're partying too hard.
you can't just call dibs on my vagina bro.
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