Yeah...you.wanna.hang.out.tomorrow?My.space.button.is.broken.
rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
They've started ranking girls from "paper-bag" to "I just came." Please come get me
I give you the lube, you make me the mac and cheese, that's a pretty fair deal I think.
it was like getting a handjob from robocop
they just named my boobs. Lefty is "Guenevere" and Righty is "I claim this boob for America"
so the good news is that i can't possibly burn my eyelashes off tonight at the bbq.
so far we have 6 big wheels and 10 boxes of wine for the tour de franzia. team drunkslut is favored to win the yellow jersey.
Say what you want, but those Fraggle Rock DVDs have gotten me laid twice.
You threw up? Were you ladylike while you did it? I'm wagering that you were. Like a Disney princess. Like a "Puke Me Pretty" Barbie.
It's like I just got slapped in the face with the cock of nostalgia.
I'd be careful with that one, she got 86'd from the family dollar while SOBER.
She swallowed the key to the cuffs, I've been having to explain the pink fuzz all morning.
He washed his dick in my kitchen sink after sex. I think he might be a keeper.
so we have roughly decided that hes the dude all the chicks will bang in college, just so he will do their term papers
Randomize
