Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
I bought a Christmas tree in my drunken state last night, after walking a half mile in search of vino and prior to my apparently playing boardgames with my boyfriend's family. There is no way you are on my level.
Whatever you do to me, stop, I found yet another blonde hair in my asshole.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
i woke up to the sound of my dad getting blown. this is my life
I had to close one eye to read the questions on my final this morning. That hungover.
Yea, i was tied up and blindfolded. And someone was throwing chicken nuggets at my face.
But she tried her best to break my penis, so she has a few free passes with me
I knew I was rolling hard when I realized I had been rubbing the couch for an hour
At first i thought she was a sexily dressed toddler. but not in a pedophile way, in a really on drugs way
Let's just say that the best way to get a girls attention is not to slap her on the ass from the window of a moving cab.
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I was gonna jerk off, but then I thought about that movie last night and it killed that idea. I have serious boner trauma.
Just got an x-ray done of my hip and you can clearly see the outline of my penis in it. When the doctor saw it she said "wow I haven't seen one that big on an x-ray before." Pretty sure the doc and the nurses are going to be talking about me on their lunch break.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
