u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Ridin mah bike see you on the moon
the girl next to me in class is drinking a margarita out of a slurpee cup. i know your going to ask how i know its a margarita and the answer is i can smell the tequila. i never want to leave this place
and you wish you could be eating a cookie right now. but all you get to eat is a penis
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
MASS TEXT! MASS TEXT! Your sad horny friend has finally gotten it in and can go back to being normal once again. You're welcome.
You were captain morganning on the laundry hamper and when I walked in you slingshotted a thong at me and started peeing. This all came back to me when I picked up some jeans to wear and they smelled like piss.
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
Haha. I have resting bitch face. He has I want y'all to die face. It's a subtle difference
At least you didn't have a hemorroid rupture while banging
I don't know man. She said my cock made her promises my heart couldn't fulfill.
He's talking about feelings now. I don't even know if he came???
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
You can't just bring up bondage and then stop answering me
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