ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
you thought that fire hydrant was a midget...you gave it a hug and asked for a lollipop.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Just ran into my ex in the WOMENS bathroom. He said I did this to him. Swore he never wore my clothes but said he liked my skirt. I need vodka.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
i find it unbelievable that you didn't think it was necessary to intervene when i started letting people autograph my body with spray tan.
Just put your hair in a bun. We're going out to drink, not to impress people.
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
He had to put the child locks on the windows so you would stop screaming at random boys
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I saw the president of my women in business club at the bar last night...I was gonna thank her for teaching me the business skills to create my own fake to get in... then i decided not
He just got back from doing field research studying wild chimpanzees in the goddamn jungle. Obviously I fucked him.
Just make sure you put pants on
....then im not going
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