Things I find upon waking: a gay man, a straight girl both clad in web bathing suits, a full bathtub, an empyt bottle of jamesons at the bottom and a scuba mask
I was happy to be the center of attention..until i realized why everyone was staring
Note to self. Champagne flavored lube is neither as tasty nor as classy as one might think.
Before we started fucking, he laid me on the bed, and asked my what my sleep number was, so that i would be "comfy"
they're making a venn diagram comparing gummi bears against gummi worms...is this what i have to sit thru to get free weed????
I might scale it back and go as an investment banker. Which is the exact same costume as James Bond on LSD. I just introduce myself differently.
apparently it was the return of drunk burrito sex.
we've had sex 4 times and he still refers to me as 'the chick in my chem class'
I think you can do her, she seemed pretty set for revenge the second time her boyfrind high fives her in the face.
He had seven beers and tap-danced on the table like a pro. HOW DOES HE DO IT
He visits one Denver strip club and now hes moving there
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
Honestly and this might sound scary... But I want to get high and play with weapons
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
lets face it, we have a liquor cabinet with a designated chocolate shelf
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