she said i was amazing, then i left to room to take the rubber off and came back to find her masturbating with my xbox controller while niko got a call from roman.
On a scale of one to trashy, how is this: Got drunk, gave a guy a hand job. In the middle of the bar
I think you broke the trashy scale
is wine microwaveable?
I think I'm on the verge of a really slutty period in my life
He broke into my apartment to check his Facebook again, the beer is all gone, and there's a new high score on pac man.
I think he pocket dials me so much because I'm in his phone as 'Air Mattress'
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
My parents got me a bottle of vodka and a puke bucket for christmas. I've already used both.
Dude too much vodka. I think I just puked up my heart
That's what you get for taking that guy home. The god of sluttiness is frowning upon you.
He came on my pillow pet. That's unacceptable. I hate boys.
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
Our first time hooking up was on New Years and we've managed to hook up every holiday since, I'm hoping this lasts until 2016 just to fulfill my American Holiday sex fantasy I never knew I had
there is a smiley face on my leg painted in blood
I'm pretty sure that's yours.
sober me thinks like you do. drunk me needs sober me's advice. am i allowed to go to his house?
I'm bleeding and intoxicated as I'm walking to my final right now. Wish me luck
Randomize
