but, i was nude. you really should respect my stupidity and delete them. please.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
I'm so bored, I can only pretend that this truck is a spaceship for so long.
she is like cheap alcohol. you can only get so buzzed before you get sick.
You couldn't stand up so I took you home, took off your makeup, put you to bed then shaved off your eyebrows. I so nearly won the responsible adult prize.
But life is now good. Well, not good, good would be not wearing the penis hat with the extended family of the boy I just cheated on, but as good as it's going to get today
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Eredayimstrugglin ..Can we talk about the fact that I just typed "er" and it autocorrected to that. Fuck my life.
She said she's different now I guess anytime you get a bible tatt it automatically cancels out all the whoring you did for 10 years
I've decided that it's a bad thing. But I've also decided that I don't give a fuck.
I would reevaluate a bf who is happy with other guys doing me.
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
tell raye i said hi and sorry for bleeding on the limes
I'm too drunk to remember your name. I'm too drunk to recall where i'm currently at. And i'm too drunk to give a shit.
I’m making a jello mold of my penis
Will it be as disappointing as your actual penis?
Randomize
