It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
My superpower would be to be able to make a chick instantly start her period just by thinking about it
she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
we need to find that guy that whips out his cock at the bar again
Can we hire someone to dj while we have sex?
This is the first time since last march I'm gonna be going to a class for more reasons than wanting to bone the girl sitting next to me.
By "met a doctor" I really mean "fucked a pre med student"
She puked her nose ring out of her face.
the only thing you and i have in common is the we like weed and looking at my naked body.
O was like, nah, fuck 50-50. My version of bi is that i'm 80% gay, 20% drug-addled decisions. Apparently he's straight on hallucinogens.
PS: bike ride of shame at 7am includes riding by kids waiting for the school bus #classy
Hungover at Subway, watching a business guy try to squeeze his way past my car to get into his. Bitch shouldn'ta parked over the line.
You truly are a temple of morality.
I am the night, I am justice, I am currently watching the fat biz guy pay a frat boy to back his car up for him so he can get in.
Randomize
