We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
scratch lunch, i just found about 7 more dicks drawn on my back
I just saw a girl walking up the hill with a little red wagon full of booze... I want to be in her study group.
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
Does this sound normal?...She's ironing on pictures of her dead cat to all of her green clothes...
I'm not sure which is more depressing, the fact that the hospital is making me put together a living will before surgery, or that all i'll be leaving behind is 25k in student loan debt
Did you blow the guy you weren't supposed to hook up with again in the bathroom of pita pit? Cause that happened last night...
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
Totally forgot we howled at the full moon last night... It's safe to say Tuesday Boozeday is my new favorite day of the week
Amanda bynes is my spirit animal
How do I have sand in my vagina if we were an hour away from the beach?
And then she said "welcome homeeeee!!!" As she got off. Best thing about being back from Afghanistan
He said he's in to distance fucking. I thought he just mean long durations. We fucked on a towel all the way down his tile hallway accross his kitchen and into the living room
It was like if the scent of sour milk and burning tires had a baby in taste form.
Alcohol and I aren't friends right now.
Randomize
