Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Billy Mays is dead, Vince Schlomi is in jail, who's going to sell me useful gadgets at ridiculously low prices now?!
Forget abc fam drinking games. Take a shot everytime Tyra says I and you'll be dead by the first commercial
my one-armed grandma is doing the YMCA. you figure it out.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
Were making a bet for which twin will relapse while in rehab. I'm going for the chubbier one
My boss just called me for legal advice. What has my life become?
I'm a college student and my dad gets more ass than I do..... do you see a problem here?
someone needs to name a hurricane after you
I'm moving out of my place and I just gave my mom a couch that I had sex on last night. Reduce, reuse, recycle at its best.
just so you know.. snorkeling hungover: great decision. I was throwing up and he couldn't even tell!
We woke up on vday and got high and played frisbee in our living room for a couple hours and then had sex. It was probably the most romantic valentine's day i've ever had
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
i'm not sure you can trust me in a car with 20 dozen donuts
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