I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
I haven't had sex in so long I'll probably find some stranger, feel guilty, go w/o sex for several months and do it all over again...always something to look forward to
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
im standing in line right now while the 711 manager calls other locations to see if they have the john cena collectors slurpee cup in stock...yep i need to get laid
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Jenna, I'm going to use all my homosexual powers to steal him from you
Austin, I will climb on top of your shoulders and slowly suffocate you with my vagina
Well I'm going to hell. But I'm going after multiple orgasms.
last night you told me I had a dark, salty butthole
We have to do it Saturday and get a thirty. If i remember correctly it takes me 12 beers to become a wizard
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
so i just realized the reason you didn't answer my call last night is because the remote isn't a phone.
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
well, i found him passed out on a picnic table two miles away with a lit cig in his hand...he had a rough night
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