Is it sad I memorized the exact change required for a #7 at Wendy's?
if you don't let us come over today i'm not taking the second plan b pill. your call.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
Let's just say a refrigerator got involved and after that I had to send him home.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Those two lesbians inspired me. A whole new way to roll. Fuck shots. Gallons of vodka is the new tequila.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
I can taunt you with whatever I want. Like batman and sex.
Please say a prayer for the elevator people at work today. My farts are significantly more potent the day after hitting that korean place for lunch...
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
I fell asleep on the floor again. i dont want help, just a pillow. its kind of nice down here.
What type of condoms do you get ? Oh and do you want a slurpee while I'm here
His birthday is on Valentines Day, of course he's getting a blowjob
I don't care how hot she was, she wouldn't stop singing "Shut Up and Dance", instant boner-killer.
Randomize
