they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I dont wanna date her. I just wanna be able to run a blacklight over her face and prove ownership.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
he kept whispering yes yes yes yes the entire 15 minutes. i almost wish it was a quickie.
the owner gave me a free bottle of vodka and a 12pack of red bull if i agreed to leave. my drunken antics are finally paying off.
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
There's 50 people in our house, none of them are wearing shirts. The keg has been relocated twice and our bathroom door is missing again...when will we ever learn?
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
I think it's time to give up this life and become vikings. You in?
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
Please don't give away my fajitas
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
Randomize
