we didnt fuck last night. again. seriously, his place is like where dreams go to die.
I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
Well for one thing, she was eating rice with a shot glass.
He said he had to make up a lie of why he couldnt sleep with her. It must really suck to have a sunburned dick.
I just watched a woman break three wood planks with her boobs. I don't know how I feel about that
We both bought three foot bongs...going to race to see who can smoke a mile first.
You can't just send the picture of my vagina back to me, 2 months after we broke up, and make small talk out of it.
he said something along the lines of "fish can smell fear"
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
It's the only time I've ever felt manly shitting myself
Dear, was it your thong we found wrapped around my hairbrush next to Rachel's bed? Please explain.
At my eighteen year old cousin's wedding. Getting hit on by a 9 year old. No one knows who he came with. I'm pretty sure he just showed up from the field behind the church. Help.
And I'm determined to make an Eiffel Tower happen sometime. I just don't know who will take the pic (first world sex problem?)
I WAS KIDDING ABOUT SLUTEMBER BUT ITS ACTUALLY HAPPENING
And the you walked in and said to the only under age dude "IM NOT SLEEPING WITH YOU TONIGHT!!!" You may not have high standards but thanks for not sleeping with my brother!
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