I just spent the night with a bunch of indian guys and i wasn't attracted to a single one. Yeah i've officially become an anti-indian indian.
Jon just got arrested by the quesadilla police
What?!?
What I actually meant, is I had a quesadilla, and Jon got arrested by the real police
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
just saw a girl throwing up in a taco bell nacho cantainor going 60 down the highway
His texts read Like a 15 year olds diary.
I swear my cock is like a magnet to my friends younger sisters mouths.
You convinced me that eggnog and rum is a great moisturizer.
i'm sorry i gave your brother a handjob while you were on the blanket next to us, but to be fair your back was turned.
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I'm totally wasted about to ride water slides. That's goddamn 'Merican. That and Clint Eastwood.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
Sex is always the answer.
Especially if the question is: what have I not had this year?
He sent me a picture of Reese's peanut butter cups next to his dick. Of course I went over.
So vagazzling was a success
Is it bad that whip cream tastes like sex to me?
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