So what's the moral of this story? Aside from 'lesbians hold grudges'?
One of my students just told me turtles are lazy and need to get a job. Fuck yes, my job here is done.
I have eleven tally marks and an infinity sign drawn on my wrist in permanent marker. Senior bar crawl stole my liver.
no seriously. she's even got the premier of the real L word on her calendar at work. that lesbian.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I'm back in the dating scene now... Since the legality issue calmed down. And my stalking charges were dropped.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
I just made a flawless coverstory for why I dont have my car and why I left the party on foot. #adultererskills
As soon as the clock wound down to zero, she declared "HALF-TIME HEAD" and pulled down my pants. After the swallow, she said "BEER CHASER," got me a new one, and asked if she could make me a sandwich. Pretty sure she's lobbying hard for a ring.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
When the hubs wants to wear his training mask during sex and pretend to be Bane you just go with it.
Randomize
