I am totally the chick from Intervention who barfs up wine and then re-eats it.
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
she asked if i had a condom...i said yes...when we finished it wasnt on...told her it was at home on my dresser.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
When I say rough sex, and show you scars from past encounters, pulling my hair a little IS NOT GOING TO CUT IT. And he just doesn't understand.
I woke up and found 10 txts from him. All sent at 6:30 am, and all about the muffin man.
I had to rush to my room and get my vibrator off my bed i didn't want him to know how long it's been since I had a decent fuck.
I woke up in my own bed clutching a key to a Ramada in another state.
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I hope our bodies realize that workaholics starts tomorrow and will be well enough to handle the hell we are going to put them through. amen.
Ok she stopped using her fork and knife and is legit eating that steak using her hands.
You know your horny when you have a sex dream about Ace Ventura, if your wondering he's awful
And then you screamed, "I JUST WANNA POUR MAPLE SYRUP ALL OVER HIM AND RAVISH HIS BODY!!"
Are these your boobs on my camera?
Randomize