the couple across the street's about to bang. go get the popcorn and come join us.
I hate girls that dress up to come to planned parenthood. I just want to be like we are all in the same boat here, we know your slutty. Its OK.
Sorry if I'm being weird. I'm dipping doritos in cabernet.
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
I might have to break the "you stay out of my sister and ill stay out of yours" pact that i have with tim
I'm on my "fiiiiirrrst" glass of wine- the quotes mean it's the last of the bottle- so I really need you to pick up your phone so we can talk about this
No, i will not have sex with him again. It felt like he was trying to bulldoze his way through me. My vagina is on strike.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
What happened to the good old days when we whispered the words beer pong and people came running?
He only likes me when I'm naked and I don't like being around him clothed. It's the perfect relationship.
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
My flask has coffee in it for finals week.. So that's responsible right?
Finally get to put my practical writing degree to use! I'm writing a craigslist ad for a threesome
Is it wrong to want to have sex with one guy who's good in bed before going out on a date with a guy I actually like?
You are now at the point where people no longer question whether or not you might be on drugs. They now know for certain that you are
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