i told him i was gay. he said that gay guys are supposed to be pretty.
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
Look dude I'm sorry I used your bong to snorkel in my bathtub last night
i'm almost positive she was a dude but like it doesn't even matter
re read what you just said
Sorry for pissing on y'all's floor last night
The little girl I'm babysitting is having a tea party, the water and chips she's passing out are doing wonders for my hangover.
That broad from the bar put her name in my phone as "The girl I'm going to marry in 10 years".
Why did I wake up with BYOB sharpied on my stomach
ANNA YOU PEED ON THE STREET. LIKE NOT EVEN SUBTLY. YA JUST SQUATTED IN THE MIDDLE OF THE HIGHWAY. And you flashed your tits to oncoming vehicles to try to get them to pick us up
I'm a lady. Ladies do NOT hump the floor.
ONE DAY CAN WE PLEASE HAVE SECRET SEX. PREFERABLY IN AN ANCIENT PYRAMID BUT I'M NOT OPPOSED TO A 4 STAR HOTEL
I just revenge puked in his shoes. This is gonna be a fun night :)
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