Getting stoned and going to costco. If i'm not back by dawn, you know what to do.
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
sometimes i wish i had boobs. not on me. just like in a drawer.
An accidental pregnancy to a guy with a trustfund is no mistake. It is a gift from god.
I got concerned once i realized you weren't there to hear us having sex. See I do worry about you.
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
We listened to Rod Stewart Pandora and slow danced in the shower.
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
Is it bad to have a craving for speed? I feel like my nose is thirsty.
if i bang your brother are we still cool?
Also, I cannot stop picturing myself in a bar, 3 years from now ordering soda. Just soda. 30 pounds over weight and wearing a cat sweater. I feel like I'm heading in the wrong direction in life.
Just saw the trailer for Spike Lee's version of Oldboy. They filmed a lot of it in A's building so like every scene features a place where I had or almost had sex. If oral counts then pretty much every scene.
Last night you made me help you pick the raisins out of a kashi bar and acted like it was the most important thing to ever happen to you or our friendship
Totally just made a post sex emergency cupcake run. My life is awesome.
All I want right now is a waffle and some fried chicken and a penis.
Randomize