The guy I fucked last night is well worth up the ass tuition. I just wish I could tell dad thanks!
he was playing drums on rock band as i poured bailey's into his mouth. tell me that's not a bonding moment.
I could be wrong, but im pretty sure i jumped off the roof after my lighter.
I always forget that visiting my hometown is like a who's who of ugly people.
there is nothing more depressing than your birth control alarm going off while you're masturbating, and realizing you've been taking pointless precautions for over a month now.
At one point they were sandwiching me, both petting my stomach, mad dogging each other. Then they somehow telepathically decided to both try to pull my pants down. Such nice guys.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
Attempted to dodge my boyfriends cum last night and ended up falling off the bed and getting the worlds most painful charlie horse. fuck my life.
Just fucked a MILF from Alaska. I love traveling.
Chang gave me a 1.5 gallon beer tasting cup, i have a new boyfriend with a huge stick, Members of the Irish Rugby team slapped my ass and cheered for firmness, and a couple of strangers are naming the child after me. Best. Weekend.Ever.
went to their party, left halfway through to fuck a pledge, came back to keep drinking. I think everyone won.
The girl next to me looks like the young version of sara (bonnie hunt) in jumanji. I wanna be like PLAY THE GAME SARA!!!!"
Hey! I need booze. And penises. And a lot of mistakes that I will regret in the morning.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
MDMA IS GREAT AND YOU WERE THE WORST GIRLFRIEND EVER.
Randomize
