So she couldn't stop dragging her teeth while she was blowing me.
Ahh dude, that fucking sucks, what'd you do about it?
Decided to drag my teeth while eating her out... She got the point.
it was beautiful and magic like when a hot girl grabs her own tits and smiles at you
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Well, shes famous, an alcoholic, hillarious, and has big boobs.... Pretty much my only aspirations in life.
She rolled a blunt with one hand...and instantly I had a boner, I'm going to marry this girl.
a search helicopter?!
My blowjobs put them in a state of relaxation similar to that of getting hit with a tranquilizer. The fear comes after the sex.
I'm out of mixers so I am using sugar water. Times are tough.
I just replaced the poop spray with an air horn... Now we wait!
I can feel my teeth in 4 dimensions. I shouldnt be this high at 8 in the morning.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
He doesn't want a full on relationship, he provides me with all the weed I can handle and gives me multiple mind blowing orgasms. He's my soul mate.
Apparently duct taping your dick to your buttcheks before the first time she goes down on you isn't as funny as projected. She cried because she thought I was a girl the whole time.
I think I'm at a stage of my life where I subconsciously purposefully fuck everything up just to see if I can find a way out of it.
I haven’t been this excited since I found out they sold cases of Jack Daniels.
Randomize
