Could you please tell me why If you were a 21 year old man why you would want to sleep with a girl who has tinkerbell bedding?
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Scored tix to flower show. Do we want to go drunk on Saturday or hungover on Sunday? Only two options.
I feel like his dick looks like a decorative autumn squash.
Sorry for locking you out after accusing you of eating my Skittles... I realized I was mistaken after just throwing up the rainbow.
You have to keep an eye on her tonight cause you know how she likes to pickpocket people when she's drunk.
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Bathroom attendant appreciated that hug I have him as a tip. Fucking BROKE these days.
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
I have a fever. Last thing I need to do tonight is be elbow deep in old lady pussy.
Owwwww. Yeah. I can barely move unless Im high on vicodin. We are bad at drinking/balancing. We will be the first to break hips and have to go into a home.
That's what you get for doing kinky shit with a guy that lives in his moms basement.
The last person that asked me out got pushed down an escalator
so do you remember taking your shirt off and just standing in your bra at the bar or no?
She never came back from the bathroom so I went to look for her... I was in my room and heard this rustling. And she was in my closet petting ties.
Randomize
