So there is a chick dressed up in a vagina costume handing out free condoms next to the dude handing out free Bibles and preaching about sin. I love college.
i think beer pong is the only time ive ever found a use for geometry
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
she vomitted in her champagne, said "fuck it, it's new years", and continued drinking.
I needed that adderall to break my tradition of passing out at the bar on Sundays
I just want school to he over so we can build a big tent, do drugs inside it, and watch cartoons until the sun comes up.
That's all I've ever wanted.
It felt as if we were fucking on a sea of baby feet and morgan freemans face hair
Well, during the ride home I had to personally apologize to both of her breasts.
He was respectful of both me and my One Direction calendar.
I Have a huge scrape on my knee and I need a better excuse than dry humping on a park bench...
He told me to prepare for his "Jurassic cock" and I had to leave the room from laughing.
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
So what's your itinerary for Amsterdam?
Show up, get drunk, get laid, try not to miss my flight home.
My blue shorts are now brown from all the stripper fake tan
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
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